Hello there everyone, how are you all?As you may know, with the exception of last weeks post, its been a while since I've blogged, and as that blog explained part of the reason for that is because for alot of the time I have been quite happy, life has been going well. Now obviously when things are going well, its Sods Law that you are not going to notice the huge great banana skin that Life periodically throws in your path, and subsequently you end up a cropper. Today is still not quit the right time for me to open up about the details of the particular banana skin I experienced, bear with me, I'm sure at some point I will blog all about it, but not today. Instead I want to talk today about funerals,specifically my funeral. Woah, woah...hang on...don't panic this is forward planning. I have no intentions of popping my clogs any time yet, but I have become a regular funeral goer in recent months, and I think I could use my newly gained knowledge to plan a superb bespoke funeral, just for me.
So what do I want for my big day.........
Now first things first....I have no intentions of being left in a cold dirty hole, don't even think about it. I like to be nice and warm, so I think a toasty fire is the way to go for me. I also am not, have never been and don't think I ever will be religious, so we will keep all the Jesus stuff to a minimum please. Choice of coffin....now this again is an easy subject simply because I plan to have already have my coffin and be using it by the time I depart from this fine earth. I imagine at this moment you are imagining some vampire type scenario, and it is true that I am a bit of a goth girl at heart, but in this instance it isn't quite what I have in mind.
Rather what I have in mind is a wicker coffin. I saw pictures of some recently and my first thought was that they are quite beautiful. Laced with flowers and in some cases ribbons they are simply too good to either bury or burn. Instead my coffin will hopefully spend many years at the end of the bed being used as a bedding box before it is needed in its official capacity.
Guests and Stuff.......OK people, Now call me perverse but I hope you will all be a little bit sad to be attending my funeral. However I aim to make it as pain free as possible for you, and hopefully you will even have a giggle or two before the day is out. Dress code has just got to be purple hasn't it. Its my favourite colour, and wont look too outrageous when you turn up at the crematorium. Of course if I could, I would have everyone in fancy dress. My best friend in the whole world married several years ago now, and she had a medieval themed wedding. It was without doubt the most awesome wedding I have ever been to. I would love to watch you all turn up in your medieval finery, but I'm a realist, purple clothing will do fine.
The music is something I have given a great deal of thought over. Some of the most beautiful songs I know have been rendered unlistenable to me ( I'm sure that is a real word ) because they were played at funerals and the connection now is there. These include The Beatles 'Yesterday', Sarah Mclachlan 'Arms of an Angel' is a particularly painful song to hear, Westlifes 'You raise me up'. Even Ken Dodds 'Happiness' is a song that now has the power to make me smile and cry at the same time.
This is the song I would most like to hear at my funeral :- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iAP9AF6DCu4 The Calling 'Wherever you will go' I apologise in advance to anyone who will not be able to listen to it afterwards, but it is such a beautiful song and I'm sure is how I will feel after I'm gone.
Another request, please if there is no one who is willing to stand up and say a few words about me, just skip that bit, there is nothing sadder at a funeral than a half hearted and often not accurate description of the individual involved read out by the presiding minister. I understand they are doing their best, but come on guys, we have had some awesome times together, share those stories, I won't mind, I may even leave a prize to the one who can tell the best one, tho I don't know quite how I will judge them.........
Hymns if we must have one will have to be 'All things Bright and Beautiful', its the only one I know the words to, and I expect you all to sing, or I'm gonna be whispering in your ear, and you don't really want that....... Mwahahahah!!!!!
The wake and ashes
So that's it people, how I would like my funeral to go. I hope you don't think this blog is too flippant, I do actually have a serious point to make. Arranging a funeral is without doubt one the most difficult things you will ever have to do, weather its for partners,parents, children, siblings, other relatives or friends. the choices are overwhelming, at a time when your least able to make decisions. So don't be afraid to talk to your loved ones about it, doesn't have to be a serious discussion, but let them know what you would like, or what you wouldn't want. So that if and when they ever need to they can call on all those little scraps of information. Doing so will make that most difficult time just a little easier to get though. That's all from me today, Bye everyone, Tracey X